in the absence of a magic wand

Well I have no funny stories at this time, there was an incident involving a large book and a small sandwich but I think you can all figure out how that ended. I did finally finish up my masters up on Monday but unfortunately my magic wand (the one that causes homework do itself or makes dirty dishes disappear - scientifically of course) seems to be on back order. I suppose that means that I will have to keep taking theorem proving naps rather than entering the one tap thinking theorem thoughts mode that such a wand should certainly come equipped to provide. I do however have a letter opener that I found when I was moving - if you are not using a letter opener to open your mail you are missing out! I know that many of you were unenthused by my (non-mechanical) pencil campaign, but I assure you this one is even better. There is a satisfying slicing/tearing sound as you open the letter, kind of like the satisfying thwack sound that comes from hitting annoying people over the head with a hollow cardboard tube, only much more socially acceptable. Not that I have had much experience hitting people (annoying or otherwise) over the head with hollow cardboard tubes but I am quite sure the thwacking sound would be satisfying. Plus, the envelope stays in a useful envelope shape and is akin to a useful put to put things in, although probably not pre-equipped with a broken balloon. Anyway, rather than sitting and staring into space while waiting for more funny stories you should all dig out your letter openers and open some letters! Well, without any flailing about, we don't want any Mr Green in the drawing room with the letter opener incidents.